‘I Would Like To Extend You a Counter-Offer To Suck My Dick’: Law School Dropout’s Job Chances Scotched As Email Goes Viral

We haven’t had a legal profession viral email story since the 'spitroast trainee' Daniel England wowed us all with his holiday plans back in February.

So it's with glee that I bring you this US tale of bad email judgement by an ex-law student who has recently abandoned her lawyer dream.

July:  Taylor Grey Meyer (pictured) drops out of law school because she is out of money. She sleeps on a friend’s couch while she applies for jobs – including a minimum wage position at the local baseball team, the San Diego Padres.

Later in July: Meyer doesn’t get the Padres job. The position goes to "someone whose background and credentials we feel best meet our needs at this time".

August 5: The Padres email Meyer to invite her to a job fair, which costs $495 (£316) to attend.

Here’s Meyer’s response (courtesy of Deadspin):

On Sun, Aug 5, 2012 at 11:56 AM, Taylor Grey Meyer <[Redacted]@gmail.com> wrote

Hi [Redacted],

I wanted to thank you for reaching out to me when thinking of ways to meet your quota for the Sports Sales Combine.

After careful review I must decline. I realize I may be burning a bridge here, but in the spirit of reciprocity, I would like to extend you a counter-offer to suck my dick. Clearly, I don't have one of these, so my offer makes about as much sense as yours. But for the price you're charging to attend the event, I'm sure I would have no problem borrowing one.

Managers like you have found this to be the most authentic training available. Real, hands-on experience getting you on your way to perfecting the techniques you will need to climb the corporate ladder. In these tough economic times, it's always good to widen your skill set.

 Let's talk about why I wasn't a good fit with your organization. Was it my extensive education that made me less of a fit, that now paying $500 will allow me to overcome? My graduate work in sports commerce? Being a law student, working toward becoming an agent? Was it my past experience overseeing the execution of national and international events? Wait, I know, maybe it was my previous internship with Major League Soccer, and that I actually got my "start" in professional sports at the age of 15 when I volunteered at a minor league ballpark in my hometown. And given all that, I chose to apply with the Padres, at least 30 times since moving to San Diego. Persevering through countless anonymous email rejections, I continued to submit my resume despite never even being granted the courtesy of a face-to-face interview. All for the joy of making $30K a year. Maybe you're right. Maybe I'm not the best fit for your company. But here's a nice fit, my foot in your ass.

All the best,

Taylor

4 Responses to “‘I Would Like To Extend You a Counter-Offer To Suck My Dick’: Law School Dropout’s Job Chances Scotched As Email Goes Viral”

  1. Alasdair

    After 30+ rejections, you'd have thought someone of her "extensive education" would get the hint that they don't want her...

    Reply
  2. Anon4fun

    "Clearly, I don't have one of these, so my offer makes about as much sense as yours. But for the price you're charging to attend the event, I'm sure I would have no problem borrowing one. "

    Borrowing one is easy. The tricky part is attaching it so that it properly functions, which not even Hollywood has figured out how to do. You see honey, penis envy ain't all it's cracked up to be, so don't believe the hype.

    Reply

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