Student website isn’t keen on lawyers
Trainee solicitors are old-before-their-time bores who stay in on Friday nights planning “their gloomy suburban future”, The Tab has claimed.
So unimaginative are these “young fogeys” that they will probably propose to their long-suffering other halves in clichéd fashion atop London landmark the Shard, before celebrating over dinner at Pizza Express, the student website reckons.
“Life’s simple when you’ve had it planned out for you and your girlfriend from the beginning. He’s got his MA from Warwick, bagged the solicitor’s training contract, and (crucially) he’s in control of his girlfriend’s life too. Why would she want to go out on a Friday when they can curl up with a boxset and post couples photos on Facebook? If they do go out for dinner, it’s 2 for 1 vouchers at Pizza Express, because the Fogey is oddly stingy. Why? He’s saving for their gloomy suburban future, and with interest rates at their current level…”
As part of its ‘The graduate’s guide to London’ feature, the website goes on to suggest that trainee solicitors typically live in quieter London districts like Chiswick, Barking and Golders Green, and frequent old man’s pubs such as the Coach and Horses in Soho.
Seemingly ignorant of the fact that the majority of trainee solicitors are women, The Tab suggests that the thing the young fogey “will first cry about” is “his girlfriend trying cocaine”.
It’s not, of course, that first time that The Tab has taken a pop at members of the legal profession, previously describing law students as “the charmless lovechild of nine grand tuition fees” and urging them to “please shut the fuck up”.