Junior solicitor releases rap album about how much he hated his training contract at top City firm

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By Alex Aldridge on

‘Square Meal, Square Mile’ details solicitor’s unhappiness during TC at top 10 City outfit.


A rookie solicitor who says he trained at a leading global law firm based in the City of London has made a rap album about how much he hated the experience.

The album, entitled ‘Square Meal, Square Mile’, has been released under the pseudonym “Mr Kelly”. However, the solicitor’s attempts at anonymity risk being compromised by the fact that he makes no attempt to hide his appearance in the video of one of the tracks that has been placed on YouTube (embedded below), or the promotional photos which he has released (one of which is above).

Having listened to the album — which is available in full hereLegal Cheek contacted Mr Kelly and attempted to find out more information about him. He told us:

“I was a trainee in a top 10 global firm, one of the largest in world. My training contract was from 2009 to 2011. I’m wary about telling you the name in case they kick up a fuss (the album is about not enjoying being a trainee). I now work as a lawyer in the public sector in London.”

‘Square Meal, Square Mile’ charts the typical day of a City trainee, beginning with opener ‘It Never Stops’, and proceeding with tracks including ‘Mid-Morning Matters’, the lunchtime-themed lead track ‘Square Meal, Square Mile’, before rounding off with ‘Letting My Heir Down’. It also considers other issues of interest to City lawyers, such as class and work-life balance.

Listeners quickly grasp that Mr Kelly really didn’t enjoy his training contract. For example, in the soulful ‘Managing Expectations’ he raps:

“Now I’m mourning in the morning, grieving in the evening about the current life I’m leading…Need some medicine to correct it, need something stronger to forget it.”

Mr Kelly’s website explains that he was driven to start rapping by his dislike of his job, with the resultant frustration he felt “needing a creative vent”. It also contains further clips of his previous spoken word performances.

Listen to ‘Square Meal, Square Mile’ in full below:

Recognise Mr Kelly? If so, please get in touch, either by leaving a comment below or by emailing tips@legalcheek.com. We won’t publish Mr Kelly’s real name, but it would be interesting to find out which firm he used to work for.