Feature

12 reasons that being a law student still sucks even though exams are over

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The pain continues

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1. Post-exam post-mortem

You’ve finished your last exam, but let’s discuss in detail how you fucked up.

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2. You are too tired to go out and celebrate

You no longer have the energy to stand up in the shower, the last thing you want to do is go to a club.

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3. Health problems caused by extreme exam stress

My hair is still falling out in clumps, but that’s totally normal, right?

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4. Your social skills have depleted

All those weeks spent hidden away in the law library have left you socially inept.

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5. Preparation of training contract apps

Law firms like these early, no time to rest. Applications considered on a rolling basis means the sooner you submit them the better.

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6. Plagued by case law-related dreams

R v Slingsby — nightmares about signet rings causing fatal vaginal cuts.

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7. You realise you have no friends

Having turned down so many nights out in order to revise, nobody bothers asking you anymore.

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8. Caffeine withdrawals

Headaches, fatigue, shakiness and irritability seem incurable as you attempt to ween off the good stuff.

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9. Immediately trying to find paid work

Having blown your student loan on that EU textbook you never opened, shitty bar work beckons.

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10. Lack of free time means you’re way behind on the latest TV series

You’re now more susceptible to having shows ruined for you by spoiler posts on social media.

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11. Unable to burn revision notes

You fight the urge to have a revision note-fuelled bonfire in case you need them for a re-sit.

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12. Lack of sympathy

Looking for sympathy about the law school struggle is futile.

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Briana Maguire is a law student on Queen Mary University of London’s senior status LLB programme.