National law firm’s ‘About Us’ page is officially our new favourite thing

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By Katie King on

Cain and Cochran solicitors can tread water for three days and cook 30-minute brownies in just 20, apparently

A national law firm has made the Legal Cheek team’s Monday morning with its weird — but brilliant — “About Us” page.

Cain and Cochran is a Greater Manchester-based law firm with consultation offices in London, Leeds, Manchester, Cardiff and Birmingham, which specialises in crime, employment and civil litigation.

But what really makes Cain and Cochran stand out from the crowd is its website’s kooky “About Us” page.

Beginning with a rather standard description of its lawyers as “intelligent, supportive and distinguished”, the page then takes a rather unexpected turn:

We at Cain and Cochran are dynamic figures, often scaling walls and crushing ice. We have been known to remodel tube stations in our lunch breaks, making them more efficient in the area of heat retention. We translate ethnic slurs for Cuban refugees and we write award winning opera’s [sic] and manage time efficiently. Occasionally, we tread water for three days in a row.

The firm also boldly claims its lawyers build suspension bridges in their gardens when bored, can cook 30-minute brownies in 20 minutes, successfully thwarted a group of terrorists in Belgium and once discovered the meaning of life (but didn’t have a pen to write down the formula).

If you’re not quite done marvelling at the Cain and Cochran team’s skill set, you can read the firm’s “About Us” page is full here: