5 Essex Court receives rhyming pupillage application

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Barristers left ‘amused’ by the creative endeavours of one bar hopeful

barristers 5 Essex court chambers students pupillage

As if the search for pupillage wasn’t difficult enough, one very creative aspiring barrister has fired off an application almost entirely in rhyme.

The inventive pupillage seeker, who hasn’t been named, was applying for one of two training spots up for grabs each year at London’s 5 Essex Court. The titbit is courtesy of the civil set’s latest pupillage selection report, a document chock-full of helpful application pointers. Produced by Jeremy Johnson QC and released this week, the report states:

“We were amused to receive our first application written almost entirely in rhyme, but we did not feel this was the best way for the candidate to convey their written advocacy skills.”

A spokesperson for 5 Essex Court’s pupillage committee told Legal Cheek: “The variety of forms each year we receive is something you really must see to believe, but this year came our very first entry in rhyme. At least it was a change from ‘I want to do crime’.”

The 2019 Chambers Most List

Embracing the young pupillage hunter’s love of rhyme, the spokesperson continued:

“More details on the applicant we cannot provide,
a data protection breach we couldn’t abide.
But finding rhymes with ‘pupillage’ is tricky and hard,
and we’re looking for barristers — we don’t need a bard.
The advice to applicants that we propose,
don’t give in to temptation: it’s better in prose.”

Creative applications aside, Legal Cheek‘s Chambers Most List shows those who successfully navigate the set’s rigorous recruitment process receive an award of £55,000. This puts its pupils on pay par with those learning the ropes over at 1 Crown Office Row, Enterprise Chambers, Hardwicke and Serjeants’ Inn Chambers.

Students considering a career at the bar still have time to get their hands on a £5 million pot of cash courtesy of the Inns of Court. The deadline is tomorrow (Friday 2 November) and your application doesn’t have to rhyme.

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Easily pleased.



So’s your mum.



If only you got as much your mum.



This should be illegal.



What I do with your mum is illegal in several US states.


Yer Da sells Avon.



Cam Kirkham baaabyyy



Clearly from belfast



“Students considering a career at the bar still have time to get their hands on a £5 million pot cash courtesy of the Inns of Court.”

No. They don’t. If successful, they might get a low 5-figure sum.

You really are imbeciles aren’t you?


BPTC applicant

NO, you are wrong. Every applicant will receive £5 million. I read it on Legal Cheek. I can’t wait to spend mine on a one bedroom flat a mere 45 minute commute from the Inns of Court.



Is “pot cash” what you pay your dealer with? Is that why your brain is too scrambled to write anything but utter tosh?



I love the way LC amends the offending passage post-publication without any acknowledgment that they have done so.



The report also endorses the value of taking on Free Representation Unit cases. 5 Essex Court said “As we say in the report, @FreeRepUnit is the best evidence of an interest in, and enthusiasm for, advocacy. Plus you get to support people who would otherwise be unrepresented. If you can, do it!” FRU has its last training day of the year on Saturday.


Pampers Inc.

“You can do it too, with the FRU!”



FRU is also the best way to get over the “completely sh1tting a brick” affliction before you get anywhere near a paying client.



Plenty of barristers have been nowhere near FRU. Taking out 30 cases will never, ever magically overcome a 2.2 degree. There should be far more honesty about the real value of volunteering.



Rumour is the application would’ve been successful but for excessive rhyming of Cunning Stunts.



This just illustrates everything that’s wrong with the bar. Discouraging creativity because it doesn’t fit the exact mould that the QCs have.


Dave Barrister

Most big ticket instructing solicitors are just dying to find counsel able to convey the effect of estoppel through interpretive modern dance.



Solicitors are idiots. Only clients matter. But I doubt clients care much for rhyming.



The winning applicant will have to be a social media whore based on their current advocates.


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