‘I’m older than my supervisor, and the dynamic feels slightly awkward’

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By Legal Cheek on

12

Career changer seeks guidance


In our latest Career Conundrum, a trainee who entered the legal profession after a previous career is concerned about the awkwardness that has arisen because they are older than their supervisor.

“Hello Legal Cheek. I am a career changer in my mid 30s and recently moved into a new team as part of my Training Contract rotation. I am reluctant to provide any more specific details at the risk of identifying myself! While this was never an issue in my previous seats, I get the sense that my current supervisor feels awkward about the fact that I’m older than them. The power dynamic feels slightly out of kilter. For example, when setting tasks they often ask, ‘Is it OK for you to do X or Y – but only if you’ve got time!’. I’m the trainee, I’ll do what you ask me! They also seem reluctant to delegate even when I can see they are very busy. Has any other career changers/older trainees encountered anything similar?”

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12 Comments

Trainee

Could just be their friendly and cautious nature – not just because you’re older. Just respond with that you’re always able to help and they should always feel free to ask/delegate.

Bob lob

This is the approach

Hapz

There can only be a few years between you and the supervisor – it’s not like you’re in your 60s! I think you might reading too much into it.

Anon

Enjoy the down time!

Lewis Silk Cut

You should send them a link to this article and say “sounds familiar!” Hehehehe

Take the

W.

Joe Box

been there, it’s fine. just dont “act your age” so to speak, act keen and enthusiastic and most wont notice

Are you sure?

Are you sure it’s not you who is finding it awkward? If an older than you supervisor behaves in the same way to you, would you have put it down to something else? They might just be polite, or may have not supervised a trainee before, or could just be a little awkward with new people?

Have a chat with them? Sounds like one of the more straight forward things that a coffee with your supervisor can help iron out…

CityTechLawyer

The issue is with them not with you. I started my TC after the age of 40 (and was significantly older than all my supervisors). I do think some firms hire better trainees/Associates – who are more well-rounded and therefore have no issues with the age of their juniors. It was ultimately part of the reason why I picked the firms I did. The trouble is it can be hard to work out which firms they are from a distance.

As for my approach I always just made it clear that I am the junior and have everything to learn, I also demonstrated that I was willing to do any tasks, no matter how menial. Putting your hand up for stuff in team meetings and around social/pro bono stuff is always good as it shows a desire to get stuck inj.

Ultimately, your supervisors need to treat you like any other trainee, and if they struggle, you just have to be consistent with your behaviour and approach and hope they work it out. As a last resort, you could take them aside and explain this to them, but they might react badly if they don’t get it.

Anyway, I’ve just had my 50th birthday and am loving my job coming up for 4 PQE so keep going!

Wigmore

What happened to communication? If you think it’s an issue, speak to them. Ask them if it feels odd having an older trainee and explain that you are there to learn from them as they have the experience.

still at lunch

Maybe get out on the lash and live a little?

Ridiculously handsome

Maybe they just don’t share your own opinion of your talents and abilities.
Are you bald, maybe?

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