Lawyers and Tattoos: What Could Possibly Go Wrong?

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By Alex Aldridge on

When I saw a picture the other day of Mexican vampire woman Maria Jose Cristerna (below), I was shocked to find out that she is a lawyer.

Cristerna’s body art, which includes metal implants in her skull, is of a level of extremity that might deter even the most open-minded of clients. Then again, the attention to detail she has showed in covering every last inch of her skin in ink hints at a fine legal brain nestling beneath those metal implants.

The closest the UK gets to Cristerna is solicitor Paul Beckett of Old Court Chambers on the Isle of Man. Oxford University-educated Beckett holds the unofficial title of the most tattooed lawyer in the British Isles. But as you can see from the portrait below, beefy Beckett hasn’t gone to the extremes of his Mexican counterpart.

Crucially Beckett’s tattoos don’t protrude from beneath his work garb – a no-no, of course, in the conservative world of law. If they did, it’s unlikely he would have soared to become “one of the leading specialists in company and trust law on the Isle of Man.”

The problem faced by outwardly conservative, strategically tattooed lawyers is that every so often they experience strong urges to show everyone what they’ve got beneath their clothes. This nearly proved disastrous for Christopher Dunn, a tattooed barrister at Sovereign Chambers in Leeds, when he got drunk at a wedding in 2007. Over to our friends at the Daily Mail:

Following the ceremony the party moved to Harefield Hall Hotel in Pateley Bridge, North Yorkshire, for the reception.

Mr Dunn (pictured) became drunk and sat at a table with three female guests.

The conversation became flirtatious and Mr Dunn, who has tattoos on his upper arms and back, was asked whether he had any more personal tattoos by one of the women who then indicated to his crotch.

He then flashed part of his pubic area but did not expose his penis.