The 6 types of law student you will encounter on exam results day

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By Legal Cheek on

Which one are you?

Exam results season is upon us *gulp*. And, it is almost certain that you will come across at least one of these six law school characters. Or maybe even a hybrid!

From the early morning drinker to the student who insists they’ve ‘100% failed’, this list will be sure to lighten your mood, providing a momentary escape from those pre-results day nerves. If you are patiently waiting, or even if you have recently survived the dreaded day, this one is for you.

1. The ‘I 100% failed’

While they were “not revising”, they were colour-coding their law books and filing their notes like something out of the Home Edit‘s book. They are also averaging 76%, have been awarded the law school’s pro bono prize two years running and won junior Wimbledon aged 17. Chill out — you’re not failing!

2. The smarty pants

Even on exam results day, this student is still explaining why the paramedic did not breach their duty of care in the tort exam. They also remind you that back in exam season, they emailed on behalf of the class to notify the professors of the misspelling of chattels in the land exam, which boosted your grade.

3. The early drinker

Summer started for this law school legend when they put down their pen, or laptop lid, in their final exam. They can’t decide whether results day is a great inconvenience or an exciting excuse to schedule in a three-day, socially distanced bender at the pub where the landlord knows them by name. They’re likely to wake up the next morning and have to re-check their results as they won’t remember what they got.

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4. The nosey one

This character sends out a “thinking of you” text to their whole criminal seminar group list, which could go as a bcc email. Don’t hold out any hope that they will tell you their results: they are likely to have missed their own release because they are consoling someone who scored 37 in trusts.

5. The ‘green list traveller’

This law student is on a last-minute trip to green list Ibiza having completely forgot about results day. They are already three Mojitos down when they find out from their friends’ updated LinkedIn pages that results are out. They remain uncontactable as they break off the shackles of lockdown to ‘find themselves’ on the White Isle.

6. The crier

They have been inconsolable for a few days now; they just cannot.stop.crying. This is unsurprising given they also cried when they got a place on their favourite City law firm’s open day and when their contract tutor had a baby. And to top it all off, they’re sitting on two TC offers! Please stop crying…

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