11 things you’ll only understand if you study law at the University of Hertfordshire

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God bless online lectures

Image credit: Instagram (@hertfordshiresu)

With first term now well underway, one Hertfordshire law student shares 11 things that only those who study there will understand.

1. The queue at Café Moot Starbucks is a legit reason for being late to lectures

I was waiting in line for my frappuccino, okay?

2. Repeatedly underestimating how tense the online MCQs are

Time is running out.

3. Boasting to other law students that your uni has its own ‘real’ court

Image credit: Independent School Parent

It even has a public gallery.

4. But never actually going into the ‘real’ court…

Oh well.

5. Using half your loan to buy ‘essential textbooks’ then realising e-law resources is free

Textbooks are overrated.

6. Feeling important AF flashing your student card to the library security, on the rare occasion you actually enter the LRC

You’re practically a VIP.

7. Finally attending one of your four workshops a week and feeling like student of the year

Science students just can’t grasp your contact hours arrangement, yet you still struggle to make it in.

8. ‘Do you know where ____ is on College Lane?’

‘No never been — only for the Forum’

9. Wishing you’d paid more attention in RES lectures when it’s time to reference your coursework

Author’s surname first? Or is it date of publication?

10. Scanning your student card every time you pass a scanner just because it makes you feel important

Image credit: Brad Horrigan

Very important.

11. Your housemates are super jealous that most of your lectures get uploaded online

Goodbye 9am lectures! (Not that you ever went anyway…)

Harriet Blayney is a law student at The University of Hertforshire.

Want to tell readers what it’s like studying law at your university? Get in touch.



12. You will never get a training contract



God have mercy!



13. You will definitely never get a pupillage


Hatfield McDonald's Manager

14. We may or may not take you. Depends if we need someone to clean the toilets during the problem night shift.



This is definitely a lie.



Goodbye first rate education, hello the University of Hertfordshire




“shots fired!”



To author – do not pursue a career in law. It is not worth the misery.



Every University, HE and FE College has a VLE with lectures, lecture notes, reading lists on it. On-line lecture notes isn’t unique to Law, or Hertfordshire University. They probably exist for your housemates course too!


Basil the Barrister

Hereford has a wonderful old Crown Court that really looks (and smells) the part.

You can visit the court on your own and sit in the public gallery, you know…

You do not need to travel down as a walking bus in a hi-viz best holding your tutor’s hand…

I’ve got some news for you (so hold onto your pull-ups)…

You’re a GROWN-UP now!



James the Electric Eel

It might take a while to walk from Hertford to Hereford though…



Or even Hampshire



Hertford has a lovely old Shire-Hall type Magistrates Court building. Well worth a visit.



They’re really scraping the bottom of the barrel for these lists, will ’11 things you’ll only understand if you study law at the University of Lincoln’ be next?



This is clearly building to the cry for help entitled “11 things you’ll only understand if you studied law but didn’t get a pupillage” authored by Alex Aldridge.



God bless online lectures

Really? If I was paying £9k a year tuition and getting youtube videos to teach-myself, I would be questioning my situation, I certainly wouldn’t be thanking God.



God is not real.



If he was he would be a right c*nt for allowing some things in this world to happen.



That song – “What if god was one of us…”

… he would be on trial for war crimes.



Dare you to say the same about Allah!


Of course, I forgot, Christians and Jews are fair game for religious insults but that doesn’t extend to some others, does it?


Giles Follinghurst-Braithewaite (Oxon)

I do not understand 5: “Using half your loan to buy ‘essential textbooks’ then realising e-law resources is free”.

Why would anyone use a loan to buy textbooks? I suppose that some peoples’ trusts vest at 21, rather than 18, but surely those students could ask mother or father to buy the textbooks instead?


The Hon. Thursby

Mother or father buy the textbooks?

What a common, smelly little turd of an oik you must be!

Surely one should put the books on account and send a servant to collect them?


The Earl of Scunthorpe

Have the servants sully their hands by going to a common shop! Such poverty!

I have my own, personally hand-written on vellum by the worlds top scholars for my eyes only!

Snivelling wretch thou art, Thursby!


Ciaran Goggins

1. You can score drugs at the underpass (local plod usually take a cut)
2. Is that hyper loon ex forces woman (?) still on security? (After 3 years she still checks you as you could be a terrorist).
3. Hertfordshi*e lead UK in false rape allegations, indeed one in 2004 led to the deletion of 7 million innocent folks DNA samples. Way to go.



Major scholarship and pupillage offers…so it can’t be that bad!


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